This was just written by a friend of mine (who is turning 45 this July). Blogging it without comments (some identifying details have been redacted):
Dear All
I regret to inform you of the passing away of my Youth yesterday. The end finally came at 10 am on 6th April 2010 when the diagnosis of impaired glucose tolerance (a kind of pre-diabetes state) and a bizzare lipid profile were confirmed. Some of you knew my Youth very well, others had only recently become acquainted. Youth took charge of my life in1982, when I joined medical school in Xxxxxx, India. Youth took over from a reasonably co-operative and shy Adolescent who had done nothing remarkable during the preceding 8 years. It was a heady time, and Youth had little time for niceties. Youth started by re-writing the rule book and throwing out all existing rules and limitations. Youth introduced me to a world of late night parties, drinking excessively, driving recklessly and missing classes in the medical school. Hangovers became a very common occurrence, and heartbreak was the order of the day. Youth was also highly principled and believe in old fashioned concepts such as liberty, fraternity and equality. This led us to get involved in multiple disastrous challenges with the Authorities, who at once stage even issued arrest orders for Youth's involvement in a strike by resident medical officers at XXX Hospital, Xxxxxxxx. Youth finally took me to UK in 1991 and I had an excellent time in London over the next 8 years. During this time, Youth became quite disciplined and we managed a few important acquisitions – in 1995, Youth spearheaded our acquisition of the Membership of the Royal College of Xxxxxxxx and 1996 saw us acquire the Xxxxxxxx fellowship. London also saw the birth of Xxxxxxxx, my first son, and many felt that this would finally slow down Youth, but these fears failed to materialise. Youth continued to be as irresponsible and care-free as before, taking momentous decisions with very little preparation. One example of such behaviour was returning to India from UK in 1999 with no stable job and no plan of what to do in life. The last ten years have been a difficult period for Youth, with the ongoing battle with Middle Age for control of my life. However Youth continued to sparkle and there were many an irresponsible and gay night when Youth was completely in charge and there was not a hint of maturity or responsibility around. I hope we will all remember Youth as this positive, irresponsible, reckless, cheerful, optimistic character who defied all odds and was up to all challenges. His passing will be missed by me and I am sure by many of my friends. In view of this sad incident, Middle Age has now taken charge of my life and will be responsible for all future decisions on my behalf. Some of you may be well acquainted with Middle Age while others have only seen Middle Age from a distance. Let me assure you that Middle Age is a very responsible, stable, level headed person and I am certain that I am in safe hands. I hope you will extend all support to Middle Age during this difficult transition as you have always done so in the past. As you all know very well, we are now on the home stretch and Middle Age is only temporary arrangement for the next few years, until more permanent and final arrangements are confirmed. sadly yours
xxxxxxxx ps. as per centuries-old tradition, a Wake will be organized at my residence on XXth July 2010 to celebrate the passing away of Youth. You are all invited to attend and remember our dear old friend in an atmosphere of gaiety and fun. I am sure this is the way Youth would have liked us to remember him. Please do not forget to get your own poisons – alcohol, cigarettes, or any other addictive substance that you are in love with. The Wake will end only when the last member of the group has passed out.
This attack upon Youth, has no doubt been engineered by Middle Age, and let me be the first to condemn this dastardly act. I don’t have a high opinion of this Middle Age guy – I’ve seen him lurking in the corners at parties, get-togethers, and even at the work place. I’ve always disliked his methods, of bullying Youth by veiled threats of all kinds, usually not delivered directly to the face, but through intermediaries – like well meaning friends, doctors, diagnosticians, and spouses. This latest attack is just one more attempt at a wanton grab for power.
But, I am sure that the news of Youth’s death is a gross exaggeration. Youth is down, but not out.
Yes, sure, Middle Age has managed to forge an alliance with the forces of Diabetes, and there is a certain shift in power, but never forget that Youth is the one who has the popular mandate, Youth is the one who has the votes of the masses, and Youth is still the charismatic leader. This is just a shift from the one-party-democracy of the 60s where Congress was the undisputed ruler to the coalition politics of the 2000s where Congress still rules, but with certain concessions to smaller parties that also have some power on their side.
Looking forward to the announcement new power sharing arrangement between Youth and Middle Age on July XX – with Middle Age getting a few cabinet level ministries, but all the key portfolios still with Youth.