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ESPN Courts Female Viewers With World’s Emotionally Strongest Man Competition

Another brillliant piece from The Onion. Excerpt:

During the show’s premiere, a two-hour special titled “Manhattan Blowout,” competitors put their bodies, minds, and spirits to the test in events ranging from the brutal grind of “Enduring Quietly As She Takes Her Hard Day At Work Out On You,” to the agility-straining “Throwing A Last-Minute Surprise Party For A Despised Mother-In-Law,” to the ultimate combination of strength and finesse, “Helping Her Over The Death Of The Cat That Always Hated You.”

Link.