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The Onion’s “obligatory” green issue

The Onion has one more brilliant issue out that is filled with gems. Here is a selection of articles from this “obligatory” green issue that I liked:

World Covers Ears, Chants Loudly As EPA Releases Ozone-Depletion Statistics
450,000 Unsold Earth Day Issues Of Time Trucked To Landfill
Small, Dedicated Group Of Concerned Citizens Fails To Change World
Report: 98 Percent Of U.S. Commuters Favor Public Transportation For Others

And this one is not really about the environment, but…
Middle East Conflict Intensifies As Blah Blah Blah, Etc. Etc.

The issue in which the Onion reported on the 9/11 terrorist attacks in the US remains one of my favorites. The Onion did a much better job of capturing things than the mainstream media.

And, Our Dumb Century is a masterpiece that is a must read for anyone intererested in a cynical, satirical, and very funny look at the events of the 20th Century.

Wayward Alzheimer’s patients foiled by fake bus stop

Image by M@rg via FlickrDo you sometimes forget what you were just going to do? Alzheimer’s patients are like this all the time. They have decent long term memory but their short term memory is pretty bad. This does lead to many problems for the people who are taking care of them.

The Telegraph has this bittersweet article about a Alzheimer’s nursing home which had to come up with a creative way to prevent the patients from trying to take a bus home:

the centre was forced to rely on police to retrieve patients who wanted to return to their homes and families but had forgotten that in many cases neither existed any longer.

When asked to suggest a solution to this problem, I’m sure most people will think of compound walls and locked gates. They have come up with a much sweeter solution. Just outside the home, they created a fake bus stop. It looks like a regular bus stop with all the appropriate signs. With the small difference that no bus actually comes there.

“It sounds funny,” said Old Lions Chairman Franz-Josef Goebel, “but it helps. Our members are 84 years-old on average. Their short-term memory hardly works at all, but the long-term memory is still active. They know the green and yellow bus sign and remember that waiting there means they will go home.” The result is that errant patients now wait for their trip home at the bus stop, before quickly forgetting why they were there in the first place.

“We will approach them and say that the bus is coming later today and invite them in to the home for a coffee,” said Mr Neureither. “Five minutes later they have completely forgotten they wanted to leave.” The idea has proved so successful that it has now been adopted by several other homes across Germany.

See full article (found here)

Do you enjoy your work?

Meetu sent me this:

• Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
• Donkey = eat + sleep
• Therefore, Human = Donkey + work + enjoy
• And, Human – enjoy = Donkey + work

So, are you enjoying your work?