I don’t remember the context now, but yesterday in a very serious tone , abu said –
“You cannot trust anyone.”
After a pause, “except yourself.”
After a longer pause, “and your family.”
I smiled a smile of relief and added, “and friends.”
me – “no?”
he – “not really. until you find out they are telling the truth, then you can trust them.”
me *pretty much stumped* – “hmmm”
~ ~ ~
This morning, while taking them to the school bus-stop, rabad’s friend T from the building, hopped into the car. After the two-minute ride, abu says –
“Mom, did you realise, I was the only male in that car.”
me, a little amused – “oh yeah.”
As an afterthought, I asked jokingly, “Why that thought? Does that make you uncomfortable?”
he – “yeah”
me, the obvious “Why?”
he – “I don’t know, just like that.”
me – “But it’s ok na, it’s your mom, your sister and your friend.”
he – “She is NOT my friend.”
me – “ok, ok. You really take the word ‘friend’ very seriously, don’t you? It is very important to you?”*
he – ‘Friend’ is a strong word.
Bus arrived, kids left. I am left stumped once again.
Digression – Must admit I felt a secret sense of pride here. I remember treating the word “friend” with a touch of preciousness too. Have no clue, what it is about being a parent that makes you proud when you see your child behave like you – even if they are not necessarily all that positive. Anyway, different topic, different post. *sigh* – end of digression.
Of course, a teeny-weeny voice inside says, this is nothing to worry about. I don’t need to bring up the label ‘trust issues’. Maybe I should also be slightly worried about him thinking of the situation in a gender-specific way.
But, largely, I wonder, what life experience of this 11-year old leads him to such well-defined thoughts/opinions, cynical as they might be. If I am to give him his space, and make his own deductions and mistakes, I will never know. Oh well…
Maybe, I’ll ask once. Just once, I promise. ;D